http://www.thejakartaglobe.com/jakar...jakarta/450440
This is so cute..........
There is no place in the world like Jakarta. For those who just got here, either on a business trip or a pleasure one, you might be charmed by its glamor. It is true what many people say about the Big Durian. It is a place where you can literally find everything.
But you have to remain watchful. At times, this city can be unfriendly too, and you surely don’t want to end up being the loser. So, here are some tips for you newcomers to survive in this city:
1. Don’t talk to strangers, really. We were told when we were children that we should not talk to someone we do not know. Well, that advice is very useful in Jakarta. I’m sure you have heard stories of how people are hypnotized and told to take money from the ATM. I’m not a person who believes in black magic, but somehow this proves to be true. So make sure that you keep your eyes wide open and hold your bag like it is the most precious thing that you have while shopping in one of the city’s malls. When someone comes to you and offers some help, simply say, “Get lost, I don’t know you.” You have to keep in mind that people in this city believe that nothing is free. So when someone suddenly becomes nice to you, it only means he or she wants something from you.
2. Jakarta has the worst traffic in the world, so don’t hesitate to drive like a mad person. Things about Jakarta’s traffic that you saw on TV were not fiction. They are real, and the city’s residents face those horrible things every single day. Yes, drivers of cars and motorcycles hate each other, and they will do anything to be able to go faster. Yes, people treat the traffic signs as if they were only accessories to make the city look nicer, so don’t be afraid if you cross the traffic light when it is red. The only way you can survive the traffic is to drive like people in this city, and that is: driving like a bus driver. Make sure no other car or motorcycle overtakes you, if they do, then you have to do whatever it takes to get your spot back. One more thing, you are not obliged to give way to a pedestrian, just keep going.
3. The air is heavily polluted and — trust me — there is nothing beautiful that you can see outside. So you better go to the city’s amazing malls, which are said to be among the best in the world. You will be surprised to find out what these malls have to offer, including the beautiful people hanging out at the expensive cafes and restaurants. Don’t think for a second about visiting the city’s cultural attractions, because they will surely disappoint you.
4. Never use public transportation. You can ride the TransJakarta Busway, but that is as far as you should go. Getting a taxi is the safest way to get around, although it may cost you a fortune. But at least you can sleep for a while until you reach your destination. Some say that the blue taxis are the safest option, but nowadays people also choose the white ones.
5. You don’t need to say “thank you” or other nice things to people. In other cities, it’s common courtesy to say “thank you” when someone does something nice to you. That doesn’t apply in this city. An “OK” might still be acceptable, more than that, it will be considered too much. Remember, don’t smile or say “hello” to random people, they might think you’re crazy.
6. You can do all the bad things that you cannot do in your home town. Don’t feel guilty if you want to treat people badly, since this city is also dubbed the “city of imagination” or “sin city.” Don’t you worry about those hypocrites who are nice, because although they might look like being favored by everybody, the truth is, they are the minority.
7. Lastly, make sure that you bring a lot of money, because in this city money is your passport to happiness. For money, people will do good things to you, including giving you a parking spot in a super-crowded shopping center or letting you relax in a VIP lounge. Money is the only decisive attribute in this city, the only element that makes you valuable as a human being. You can only be called “a good person” if you have money and let others know about it.