Met someone online but I'm married

[LeGarcon]

They do. Just haven't met the right one to appreciate them yet.

[nacal]

bro, chanced upon this thread while watching Olympics. I'm married too with a kid 1.5 yr old. Last yr for some reason i got too attached to 1 thai FL, felt too comfortable with here i guess.

During her last week in spore, i will buy singha beer for her and try to book her last session for the day so i can stay overnite with her. I will bring my laptop for her so she can log in to her FB and keep in touch with her family. Her little sis knows wat she's doing in spore but not her mother.

From first overnite with her onwards, it's not about physically but emotional. I look forward for her company (who wouldnt, young syt who has to work in this line becoz she's poor). Even after she goes back to thailand, i added her as a fren using separate account in FB and i browsed her status update and msgs daily hoping to see her reply.

As time goes on, frequency drops and slowly i don even log in anymore. Bro i think this will happen to you too no worries, it won last. After that i've been thinking why/what happened to me. It can be anybody, it does not have to be her., it can be someone like her (there are at least 100k out there). It is the feeling that i am seeking, good news is it nv last. hehe.

Of coz, i still love my wife very much, even then and now. That time i just want to try what it is like. I nv had paid sex bfore marriage. My wife's still good, just a bit lazy who keep complaining to want to quit her job.

And bro, if u would allow some feedback.... From what you have described,and if it's not talked from spur of emotion-> "I'm fucking sick and tired but I'm trudging on for the sake of my kid. I'll concentrate on my career n concentrate on earning that first million and shall care less about other things".

What i feel is, this might not be the most healthy way to approach this. You are just tolerating and it will explode. Your dominant thoughts, the way you act and talk, your kid will absorb everything. In view of this, hope you will feel the urgency to do something..

1st, forget about your wife. You cannot change her. Forget about changing her for now. She can only help herself, accept that it's out of your control for now.

2nd, You're sick and tired mentally, because of unrealistic expectations of your wife. If.. if you can lower your expectation of her a little bit, you will feel more relaxed.

3rd. Acknowledged that your are selfish if you seek appreciation from your wife. Real selfless intent do not harbour such strong appreciation wants, like doing charity work for the disabled? Do you expect them to thank you with tears in their eyes, no right?

lastly.. it's all in the mind bro.. you can do the housework with a smile or with a sour face. You can choose to.. really. it's the thoughts "why is she not helping bla bla bla, why why why am i doing this" that is the culprit. Cut down on such thoughts.

Bro this is the best i could muster for now.. coz im still training. remember that this is for the good for your kid. You would want your home to be warm and not full of quarrels. You cannot change your wife, you can only change yourself. If you really can achieve this.. it's the best present to your child.

I sense that you are the more giving party to the relationship. It's tough, persevere for your kid.

own nagging: Now i do the sweeping/mopping of floor. I also do all the cooking, and i started to learn baking bread and cakes. My wife just eats and sometimes help to clean the dishes (she nv cooks, at the start she cannot even start the stove properly). Sometimes i do get angry, but not at my wife coz i don expect her to help. I get angry at the bread dough and my own clumsiness, and the hot weather.

[iossshee]

Rules for a Happy Marriage

1. Never both be angry at the same time.
2. Never yell at each other unless the house is on Fire.
3. If one of you has an arguement, let it be your mate.
4. If you have to criticize, do it lovingly.
5. Never bring up mistakes of the past.
6. Never go to sleep with an argument unsettled.
7. Neglect the whole world rather than each other.
8. At least once everyday try to say one kind or complimentary thing to your Life's partner.
9. When you have done something wrong, be ready to admit it and ask for Forgiveness.
10. It takes 2 to make a quarrel, and the one in the wrong is the one who does the most talking.

[Greatking]

Originally Posted by iossshee

Rules for a Happy Marriage

1. Never both be angry at the same time.
2. Never yell at each other unless the house is on Fire.
3. If one of you has an arguement, let it be your mate.
4. If you have to criticize, do it lovingly.
5. Never bring up mistakes of the past.
6. Never go to sleep with an argument unsettled.
7. Neglect the whole world rather than each other.
8. At least once everyday try to say one kind or complimentary thing to your Life's partner.
9. When you have done something wrong, be ready to admit it and ask for Forgiveness.
10. It takes 2 to make a quarrel, and the one in the wrong is the one who does the most talking.

One sentence enough.
Learn the art of stepping back and giving in. The Art of Blissful Marriage is being understanding for the sake of Love and Commitment.

[cocacola2012]

Originally Posted by LeGarcon

Wow bros and sistas, I haven't looked back at my thread for a while. Quite surprised to see it still alive. Thanks for the PMs and encouragement I still receive every now and then.

Belle had some issues and is now finally back together with her bf. prior to that I had been her virtual shoulder, her support. When she needed to let things out she would text me. I would text her to make sure she was ok, while I was balancing a new job, my wife's sloth and a whole lot personal problems.

So belle finally cleared things up with the bf n the last msg from her was almost a month ago. Said she was with her bf and requested I not text her cos her bf wouldn't like it and would text me when she could. The exact last MSG reads, "will text you when i can, don't reply". And.......... That's it. Oh well. I haven't texted her since and from the updated whatsapp profile (the new version that allows us to use our own pics on our profiles) she's very happy now with her bf.

Will she remember the guy who was deeply concerned with her well-being ("i can't thank you enough for being there for me..." she said). Don't think so. Would she even think of the guy who clicked on an intimate and intellectual level with her? Don't think so.

So guys, don't be a fool for someone whom you haven't met. Nice guys don't get appreciated. Been a nice guy for 30 over years and what do I get? Oh well.

Contrary to what many have mentioned, I have tried to make things improve in my marriage but I guess theres only so much I can do. My only wish is for my kid to grow up healthily. And bros please don't try and tell me to work on it yadda yadda. I appreciate it. But really some things are not meant to be. I'm fucking sick and tired but I'm trudging on for the sake of my kid. I'll concentrate on my career n concentrate on earning that first million and shall care less about other things.

To Maseratis and Porsches that we are all aiming for, to the nice men who provided shoulders for women to cry on only to be ditched like a doormat. To the guys who have to deal with crap in their marriage. To the ppl here who have given me encouragements and valuable advice. Thank you.

hey bro, it should be a happy ending by now, and wish you all the best, should really put in more efforts on your family, or you might heard before, "woman is made of water", try to touch her the way before you two married. hope things work.

[Ladyrain]

Originally Posted by iossshee

Rules for a Happy Marriage

1. Never both be angry at the same time.
2. Never yell at each other unless the house is on Fire.
3. If one of you has an arguement, let it be your mate.
4. If you have to criticize, do it lovingly.
5. Never bring up mistakes of the past.
6. Never go to sleep with an argument unsettled.
7. Neglect the whole world rather than each other.
8. At least once everyday try to say one kind or complimentary thing to your Life's partner.
9. When you have done something wrong, be ready to admit it and ask for Forgiveness.
10. It takes 2 to make a quarrel, and the one in the wrong is the one who does the most talking.

This is classic ESP 4, 6 8 and 9.

[Botakhead]

Originally Posted by Ladyrain

Nice girls, nice wives. They don't get appreciated too.

You have been hurt badly?

[MountainTurtle]

Originally Posted by iMonk

bro, be careful... there are lots of sex maniac around who like to play Master Mind games

Orh mi tou fou, 山龟，from 少林寺 reports and greet Imonk.

Even if a nymphomanic that comes along playing "master mind games" please don't take it as a weakness, conquer it and be the player on the player.
*YAWN*
Crawling back to my cave and sleep, the stars from my mountain are so bright tonight. Have to wake up 8.30am tomorrow and do my morning prayer.*yawn*.

[I.m.Jim]

Originally Posted by iossshee

Rules for a Happy Marriage

1. Never both be angry at the same time.
2. Never yell at each other unless the house is on Fire.
3. If one of you has an arguement, let it be your mate.
4. If you have to criticize, do it lovingly.
5. Never bring up mistakes of the past.
6. Never go to sleep with an argument unsettled.
7. Neglect the whole world rather than each other.
8. At least once everyday try to say one kind or complimentary thing to your Life's partner.
9. When you have done something wrong, be ready to admit it and ask for Forgiveness.
10. It takes 2 to make a quarrel, and the one in the wrong is the one who does the most talking.

To sum it all up! Don't take each other for granted, because a relationship is a never ending upkeep from start of relation to marriage to sharing a life together with kids.