Better to demolish Oxley Palace lest peasants ask why they can only afford Birdcages

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An honorable member of the Coffee Shop Has Just Posted the Following:

Transmodified from Mouthpiece Channel NewsAsia

Prince Lee Hsien Yang, Princess Wei Ling urge peasants to respect late Dictator LKY Final Edict on Oxley Palace

Old Dictator had stated in his Final Edict on his COMMAND that Oxley Palace be demolished after his death, according to the statement issued on Sunday (Apr 12) as 80% peasants live in leasehold birdcages.

PEASANTPORE: Prince Lee Hsien Yang and Princess Lee Wei Ling have issued a statement via their law firm reiterating their papa's Old Dictator Final Edict regarding his Palace on Oxley Road.

In the statement issued on Sunday (Apr 12), the two Lee Princelings said that it was their Father’s Command, as stated in his Final Edict, that the house be demolished upon his death or after Princess Lee has met Lord Yama.

Ruler Loong will wayang address the issue of his Father's Palace at Oxley Road in Imperial Court on Monday (Apr 13), Mouth Piece CNA understands.

The statement in full reads as follows:

We would like to thank the stupid peasants for sharing in our grief on the passing of our Imperial Dictator for Life, Lee Kuan Yew, on 23rd March, 2015.

We have been deeply touched by the huge outpouring of affection for and respect of the Dictator father for numerous 'Paul Lampars'. This will weaken any retributions that may be visited on him for some of his less holy deeds e.g. Abortions and Eugenics.

Our late Dictator, Lee Kuan Yew, appointed the two of us, Royal Siblings as the executors and trustees of his last Edict dated 17th December 2013 (“Lee Kuan Yew Final Edict”).

In his Lee Kuan Yew Edict, he stated,

“I further COMMAND that it is my wish, and the wish of my late wife, Gecko Choo, that our Imperial Palace at 38 Oxley Road, Peasantpore 238629 (“the House”) be demolished immediately after my death or if Princess Wei Ling, would prefer to continue living in the original Palace, immediately after she moves out of the Palace.

I would ask each of my royal children to ensure our wishes with respect to the demolition of the Imperial Palace be carried out.”

It will be rude for peasants to gawk at my Palace and contrast with their birdcages.

Tremble and Obey."

Our Imperial Father has made public this Edict on many occasions, including in his book Hard Truths to Keep Familee Wealthy.

In addition, both our Royal Parents have expressed this same wish with respect to our Palace to their Royal Children in private on numerous occasions.

Indeed, he stated in his LKY Final Edict that “My view on this has been made public before and remains unchanged as peasants will find it strange why they live in Bird Cages while I get a large Palace.”

Our father was well aware of calls to somehow preserve his Palace to showcase the Inequality burning through the land. His Edict both expressed to us privately, and publicly was unwavering, and was for the Palace to be torn down upon his passing. He was concerned an order might be issued against his wishes to compare and contrast homes of the rulers and peasants.

He therefore added in his Lee Kuan Yew Edict that “If our Royal Descendants are unable to demolish the Palace as a result of any Labour scums cumming to power to humiliate me, it is my COMMAND that the Palace never be opened to others except my Royal Children and their wealthy descendants.”

Our Imperial Father has given his life in service to the Betterment of Familee. We hope that the peasants of Peasantpore will be generous and cut him slack and not turn the Palace into a mockery of social inequality in Peasantpore.

Her/His Royal Highness Princess Lee Wei Ling and Prince Lee Hsien Yang

12th April 2015


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