my affair with my sis in law

[killerjacky]

bro the path of recovery is hard i know cos i stil recovering ..

[NikonCamera]

Originally Posted by seowlang

I didnt cry after reading the letter, i wept.

last but not least, i really appreciate those who offered to want to meet me. prolly the skeleton in my closet is so big that i dont have the balls to meet ppl here. pardon me.. i would really love to meet u. from the bottom of my heart. So, one day, maybe just one day, i can muster enough courage to call u out for coffee or maybe something stronger? i already had a bro who told me that his offer to meet me will stand till im ready. I am very touched bro. u know who u r. cheers and all the best to u.

signing out for now,
Seowlang

I dropped a few tears after reading J's letter. Remind me partly of a Chinese legend love story, a pair of butterfly lovers, Liang Shanbo (梁山伯) and Zhu Yingtai(祝英台). Of course, yours wasn't that tragic compare to the Chinese story but it was sad enough. Anyway, glad that you're okay and all the best. Take Care bro.

[niceboyatsg]

Originally Posted by loneyheart

When an affair started t lady sure said dum worry I know u r married ..tat will b an affair w no string attached
What She only want is just when u r free just give her a call n meet
As time go she will ask for more time w u even try to meet on weekend ...family day
Slowly tears will flow ... she will say at 1st just an attraction now became LOVE ...she cant leave u ... then u were trap
After 1 fine day just like u ...u had an oversea asignment had to force to part for days or wks or months
When u return she finally had t courage to break off w u

Times had force her to bare t unbareable .... tats wo u
Once she felt t most pain she awaken .... she cant do it anymore if not no ending
U should be thankful tat u had an oversea assignment if not u r waiting for a bomb to explore
Woman r very sensitive ... I mean yr wife ... she will notice yr changes after some time

I bellieve u n J r real n true w each other
Time had make u chance to b w J
Time had let u enjoy t most precious moment w J ...Bro u r already t luckiest man
Time had let u had an excuse n let J to make up her mind what she want ... to break w u
Respect her ...Dum make her suffer anymore ... u hv a family but she is frighting alone
If u really love her ... let her go ... u cant give her anything ... just pain of wanting u ... n keep waiting for u

Lastly to u ...TIME WILL HEAL

I was once in yr shoe but was w my former work partner
tat was10 yrs ago ... but at time till now I still recall t sweetest moment w her
Tat feeling of wanting her was gone ... but t sweet moment still stay forever in my heart ...
Think abt it again ... it was t most foolish thing tat I had done... but t most sweetest n precious part of my life ... w no regret
I will still give it a hearty smile when ever I think of it

Fully Agree.. Well Said bro..

[spectreray]

Bro TS,

Nice story...reminded me of my mist....if I can write like you... would have pour out like you.....sighzzzz.....

Remind me of my last trip with her......her last deep and slow look at me in shenzhen b4 we part....then I knew something was wrong.....few weeks later....sms received saying getting married....know cannot be together so she get married to her ex.....like you...didn't cry....but wept.....staring blankly n can't think of anything for weeks......

Luckily...now still friend n keep in touch occassionally.....

[cunninlinguist]

Originally Posted by seowlang

I didnt cry after reading the letter. I wept.

hey dude

u will learn that life goes on . . . if u can't see beyond the horizon, u just have to know when enough is enough. had my fair share of affair before and after marriage. both instances, emo was involved. the former with a married woman, who was my colleague. i initiated the breakup when i finally come to my senses that she is never going to get a divorce and we won't be together; the latter, also my colleague but in an overseas office. she intiated the breakup and its the same reason why i broke up with my former. though reckless, but we are all adults and all good things come to an end. at the end of the day, only the memories remain.

[cunninlinguist]

btw, after the 2nd breakup, i have plenty of opportunities to fool around. but i made a promise to myself that i will never go into another underground relationship again as long as i'm with my wife, no matter how tempting it is. partly because of the guilt of betrayal, partly because of the pain of another breakup. another part is of the fear if my wife discovers and my whole family falls apart if it ain't manage well. if anything, it's commercial sex - pay & fucked off. no emo, no feeling, just shiok. big head over little head.

[jjjr]

Originally Posted by seowlang

i dont know if anyone of u has ever experience having your partner crying out loudly within 10 mins after having sex. it scared the shit out of me. those words spoken were human feelings. it didnt help that my weakest point is to see a woman cry. call it whatever, but dont u always wanna protect a woman when they show u their ultimate sign of weakness ie tears? not only lovers, but even your mother, sister or even a good friend. u would want to lend your shoulder.

Bro seowlang, certainly can relate to that. Got involved in a relationship that should not have started just because she opened up and cried. I wanted to protect her and give her a safe harbor then. As in all situations, there will be 2 camps. I am in the "sympathizing" camp and feel for you. J's letter brought a tear to me and I am not even an interested party. You have many bros supporting you here. Heal and move on, bro.

[gottosam]

Bro seowlang, hope u r moving along fine and recovering well.
I was chatting with a close buddy of mine and relating to him your story.
He told me that one of his close friends (let's call him T) also went thru a relationship like yours which lasted for a couple of years...this happened during the first few years of his marriage when T and his wife didn't have kids yet and wife was busy with her career.
After the relationship with SIL ended (T was the one who initiated the break and SIL was heart-broken but accepted as it was not going anywhere), T still have to see her 2-3 times a week as his in-laws were very insistent of having family dinner together. Initially, it was still ok until when the SIL found a boyfriend later, T fell bad as the boyfriend was very nice to him and even helped him in a couple of situations. SIL and boyfriend married 2 years ago. T's relief came last year when SIL followed hubby for overseas work posting for 3 years.
How's your current situation with J...hope it's ok.
Waiting patiently for your next installment. Cheers!

[seowlang]

Originally Posted by cunninlinguist

btw, after the 2nd breakup, i have plenty of opportunities to fool around. but i made a promise to myself that i will never go into another underground relationship again as long as i'm with my wife, no matter how tempting it is. partly because of the guilt of betrayal, partly because of the pain of another breakup. another part is of the fear if my wife discovers and my whole family falls apart if it ain't manage well. if anything, it's commercial sex - pay & fucked off. no emo, no feeling, just shiok. big head over little head.

Cunninglinguist, i kinda of love yr pseudonym. =)

you sounded very much like me. it will be very interesting to hear more from u, perhaps even in this thread. no worries, i wont accuse u of hijacking my thread.

i know im incapable of handling a fb or fwb ever since J. and i was presented with another opportunity this year, this time with a customer (wont go into mundant details.) we were flirting like nobody's business but i must say i was doing it partly bcos my job calls for it. she was a divorcee and can tell she is yearning not only for a friend but a partner. she dont mind me being married even. BUT, i drew the line. nothing happened even after many sessions of drinks. i know im incapable of not involving feelings and i cant proceed into this again. plus, i really dont want to betray my wife again. this customer has been a rather close friend ever since. she knew i was not going to go anywhere else except being a confidante.

hope to hear from u dude.

[seowlang]

Originally Posted by jjjr

Bro seowlang, certainly can relate to that. Got involved in a relationship that should not have started just because she opened up and cried. I wanted to protect her and give her a safe harbor then. As in all situations, there will be 2 camps. I am in the "sympathizing" camp and feel for you. J's letter brought a tear to me and I am not even an interested party. You have many bros supporting you here. Heal and move on, bro.

thanks brother.

[seowlang]

Originally Posted by gottosam

Bro seowlang, hope u r moving along fine and recovering well.
I was chatting with a close buddy of mine and relating to him your story.
He told me that one of his close friends (let's call him T) also went thru a relationship like yours which lasted for a couple of years...this happened during the first few years of his marriage when T and his wife didn't have kids yet and wife was busy with her career.
After the relationship with SIL ended (T was the one who initiated the break and SIL was heart-broken but accepted as it was not going anywhere), T still have to see her 2-3 times a week as his in-laws were very insistent of having family dinner together. Initially, it was still ok until when the SIL found a boyfriend later, T fell bad as the boyfriend was very nice to him and even helped him in a couple of situations. SIL and boyfriend married 2 years ago. T's relief came last year when SIL followed hubby for overseas work posting for 3 years.
How's your current situation with J...hope it's ok.
Waiting patiently for your next installment. Cheers!

thanks. i think im moving along pretty well, ever since i shared this story. i wont lie to say i have fully recovered. i guess a part of me died.. seriously.

before J, i was always the life of parties/gatherings. the one also making the jokes and teasing everyone in the group. but since J and i ended, i mellowed down alot. to the extend that a friend whom i havent seen for a long time noticed that i have quietened down alot. i guess its inevitable.

anyway, there were some request for me to reveal how is J and my life after the breakup, esp when we meet. i will go into that when i have some time.

cheers
sl

[seowlang]

Gee, i actually have a female samster who created an account just to write to me. she was troubled like me but not with a relative. i hope i can coax her to come out and tell her story. we badly need some female voices here.

[Regular1000]

One of the 2 tread I have followed. Keep it up Bro TS.

Cheers,
Regular

[gottosam]

Originally Posted by seowlang

thanks. i think im moving along pretty well, ever since i shared this story. i wont lie to say i have fully recovered. i guess a part of me died.. seriously.

before J, i was always the life of parties/gatherings. the one also making the jokes and teasing everyone in the group. but since J and i ended, i mellowed down alot. to the extend that a friend whom i havent seen for a long time noticed that i have quietened down alot. i guess its inevitable.

anyway, there were some request for me to reveal how is J and my life after the breakup, esp when we meet. i will go into that when i have some time.

cheers
sl

Bro sl, thanks for your reply. If u r not ready to talk about your current situation with J (it might re-open wounds), I understand and will patiently wait till u r comfortable to do so. Take care!

[seowlang]

someone just up my rep and now when my cursor points at the green cards at the right hand corner, its says:

"Seowlang is a helpful and caring samster."

wah, a very nice tagline to who ever had created for me. can u identify yourself pls? and how do u change someone's tagline when u point to their green cards?

this rep doesnt serve any purpose for me but i guess its appreciation for my sharing.

thanks and cheers