Met someone online but I'm married

[fdome]

Originally Posted by Bigbadken

Like wat other bros had suggested, i think u should sit down n voice ur concerns to ur wife. There are many temptations out there but dun let them ruin ur marriage. Its not worth it.

yes, cheongers need to remember that marriage is for long term, and fl / others are for play and forget

[sane]

Originally Posted by fdome

yes, cheongers need to remember that marriage is for long term, and fl / others are for play and forget

This scene is not for everybody, want to play outside also muz depends whether they r those 拿得起，放的下。If not, it will only make one more miserable with emotional heartstrings.

[badboy123]

zzzzz... seriously. its a marriage you are talking about!

ALWAYS REMEMBER! SEX CAN BE BOUGHT BUT MARRIAGE CANNOT!

[badboy123]

Originally Posted by badboy123

zzzzz... seriously. its a marriage you are talking about!

ALWAYS REMEMBER! SEX CAN BE BOUGHT BUT MARRIAGE CANNOT!

PLEASE DIFFERENCIATE SEX FROM LOVE!!!

i have gone through what you have gone through as well!

[fdome]

Originally Posted by sane

This scene is not for everybody, want to play outside also muz depends whether they r those 拿得起，放的下。If not, it will only make one more miserable with emotional heartstrings.

thanks sis, you are right How do you find your life in SBF, more exciting than b4?

[sane]

Originally Posted by fdome

thanks sis, you are right How do you find your life in SBF, more exciting than b4?

Hi bro, not bad, still learning from the bros here

[LeGarcon]

Originally Posted by sane

btw for guys, if someone really touch your heart n keep a distance away fr u, is it really possible to forget her?.

Currently in my 30 over years there are 2 girls whom I cannot forget. They have a special place in my heart. Small space. But cut out for them and never replaced. Never forgotten. So I guess for those that really touched our hearts, nope wont forget one.

[sane]

Originally Posted by LeGarcon

Currently in my 30 over years there are 2 girls whom I cannot forget. They have a special place in my heart. Small space. But cut out for them and never replaced. Never forgotten. So I guess for those that really touched our hearts, nope wont forget one.

Thanks, I believe in that too. Then how to see whether he really likes her as a friend or just merely want to find a fb?

Sometimes its v frustrating that when u only geninuely want a platonic friendship yet the other party is trying his best to be nicest just to see whether there's a chance to take things further as in being fb since other parties are attached and unable to develop further.

How abt u? If there's a chance for her to be ur fb, will u go for it?

[nuclearkid]

Originally Posted by LeGarcon

Am finally out of moderation mode. I had replied to u bro nuclearkid but not sure if the post will appear.

Thanks for providing a POV that is similar to mine. I made the unfortunate mistake of getting myself infatuated with belle. She could have been my version of your friend.

As things go, I have seemed to signed my own death warrant with belle when I stupidly called her baby again. She has her own relationship problems and wouldn't want me complicating matters. It hurts really when a seemingly good friend totally ignores u now.

I have sent her one or 2 normal friendly texts but as expected she doesn't reply them. I have to accept the fact that I have lost her friendship now.

Thanks for your insights bro nuclearkid. I wish I hadnt made the damn mistake of being infatuated with her. She could have been a good chum.

'Baby' means different things to different people. I got a friend who texts me 'baby' from time to time although we are both blokes and he is a big, manly guy with no homosexual tendencies as far as the eye can see. Perhaps Belle had issues to deal with internally, as you have alluded to regarding her own relationship, rather than your assumption that calling her 'baby' killed the friendship. Don't need to shoulder all the guilt yourself, things can be simpler than you think.

Nonetheless, not all is lost, the experience you have gained would stand you in good stead and I believe you should handle the next one better. I am quite sure you will have a next one, should you go on finding. I won't say its a bad thing. You need someone to talk to and its impossible to talk to your wife about your wife without getting your head chewed off.

I won't be conventional here and advise you to have a heart to heart talk with your partner to resolve this funk as there are those of us who know some partners are untalkable and utterly egocentric. Your mother-in-law made a telling comment when she said what she said. And reading between the lines, its a good guess that she wasn't expecting you to have it easy with her daughter. Your current predicament has so far been corroborating.

Personally, I see the need to cut one's losses at some predetermined point, with kid(s) in tow or not. Your kid will have his/her own life in 20 years and before that, you can still play your part as a role of a father. Being a part of a dysfunctional marriage isn't exactly the definition of a complete home despite being physically with your wife under the same roof. You can be blissfully happy with another woman and still fulfill your role to the child as a father, its well within your control. They will eventually grow up understanding what you did for your own happiness, especially if they know you have done your best to salvage what you could with their mother.

Meanwhile, can't say much more as to how you can improve your situation. Some day, a breakthrough will come along and you will be happier. Until then, just wait. Take it easy on yourself, you can't think your way out of every single problem. Einstein said this and it had helped me through tough moments just by sitting it out... "No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it".

[sean69]

Originally Posted by LeGarcon

Currently in my 30 over years there are 2 girls whom I cannot forget. They have a special place in my heart. Small space. But cut out for them and never replaced. Never forgotten. So I guess for those that really touched our hearts, nope wont forget one.

there is only 1 woman whom i cannot and will never forget.. she is my mother who passed away many years ago ...

other women comes and goes, but at least i know my mother loves me unconditionally regardless of what i have done... she will not judge me but accepts me..

[LPPlol]

Originally Posted by LeGarcon

Thanks for your insight bro sane. Whilst it is good advice, I'm afraid it doesn't apply here. My wife was already like this before she got pregnant. I mentioned she made me almost break up with her just before she told me she was pregnant.

Also I mentioned somewhere that I do most of the chores. If I don't nag she wouldn't even bathe my boy. If u ask whether she is devoting her time to my boy i'd say hardly.

LOL... bro LeGarcon

We must have been twin brothers somewhere in our last lives...

I also do most of the housework wor! But the diff is that my wife is not pregnant.

[Botakhead]

Why do I have the feeling that having FB must be emotionally attached? This is 2 hands clap then got sound logic, both parties must agree to just have sex, hot sex, nothing but sex, especially when those married ones cannot get fulfilment from their married other half.

Better to keep emotions clear from FB, or even FL. Some can even go so far to fall in love with WL to the stage of getting married. I'm not here to put any one down, just to be clear what kind of R/S needed to be emotionally involved.

Got to balance this out, marriage is because, both are 'deeply' in LOVE with each other, then you all proceed to VOW. Of course there are also the circumstances of a shotgun marriage......all done already but not really full hearted marriage.

This is where the society accepted anulment and divorce to be legal binding. Make sure you have enough money to go around the situation.

Whatever the case, be clear of what you are doing, not to hurt anyone in the end.

[LeGarcon]

Originally Posted by sane

Thanks, I believe in that too. Then how to see whether he really likes her as a friend or just merely want to find a fb?

Sometimes its v frustrating that when u only geninuely want a platonic friendship yet the other party is trying his best to be nicest just to see whether there's a chance to take things further as in being fb since other parties are attached and unable to develop further.

How abt u? If there's a chance for her to be ur fb, will u go for it?

For her to be an FB she has to be a B first. As perhaps u can tell, I'm more in need emotionally and dare I say it, intellectually. I'm like an Alter Bridge/Satriani/Steve Morse guy. I'm paired up with David Guetta/Lady Gaga. Zzz.

I'll need to fulfill that need first before physical comes along. I'm not a Wham Bang Thank you Ma'am guy. So to be very honest, there is a possibility IF it happens. But not now when physical need is not a priority now. I have my trusty right hand.

But of cos this is a valid concern, sis Sane. I'm sure Belle might think that way too.

[LeGarcon]

Originally Posted by nuclearkid

'Baby' means different things to different people. I got a friend who texts me 'baby' from time to time although we are both blokes and he is a big, manly guy with no homosexual tendencies as far as the eye can see. Perhaps Belle had issues to deal with internally, as you have alluded to regarding her own relationship, rather than your assumption that calling her 'baby' killed the friendship. Don't need to shoulder all the guilt yourself, things can be simpler than you think.

Nonetheless, not all is lost, the experience you have gained would stand you in good stead and I believe you should handle the next one better. I am quite sure you will have a next one, should you go on finding. I won't say its a bad thing. You need someone to talk to and its impossible to talk to your wife about your wife without getting your head chewed off.

I won't be conventional here and advise you to have a heart to heart talk with your partner to resolve this funk as there are those of us who know some partners are untalkable and utterly egocentric. Your mother-in-law made a telling comment when she said what she said. And reading between the lines, its a good guess that she wasn't expecting you to have it easy with her daughter. Your current predicament has so far been corroborating.

Personally, I see the need to cut one's losses at some predetermined point, with kid(s) in tow or not. Your kid will have his/her own life in 20 years and before that, you can still play your part as a role of a father. Being a part of a dysfunctional marriage isn't exactly the definition of a complete home despite being physically with your wife under the same roof. You can be blissfully happy with another woman and still fulfill your role to the child as a father, its well within your control. They will eventually grow up understanding what you did for your own happiness, especially if they know you have done your best to salvage what you could with their mother.

Meanwhile, can't say much more as to how you can improve your situation. Some day, a breakthrough will come along and you will be happier. Until then, just wait. Take it easy on yourself, you can't think your way out of every single problem. Einstein said this and it had helped me through tough moments just by sitting it out... "No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it".

Lol u are speaking directly to my brain, Nuclearkid. I don't think I'll go on finding a new confidante on purpose. I've closed that social network account. She has her own issues and I think she has her own way of dealing with them. I have to respect that and since I've said to her I'll not contact her anymore I'll stick to my words. Just hope one day she'll remember me as a friend and not another fucker trying to get into her pants.

This has been generally a bad experience for me. Likely I had been a coincidental replacement for her ex-ex. I dunno. Perhaps her "i'll think of you"s and "I don't want you to disappear"s were all directed at him not me.

Thanks bro for really understanding where I come from.

[LeGarcon]

Originally Posted by LPPlol

LOL... bro LeGarcon

We must have been twin brothers somewhere in our last lives...

I also do most of the housework wor! But the diff is that my wife is not pregnant.

苦命 brothers we are. Lol. Got kid lagi worse can. Clean poop. Feed. Change. Prepare milk. Drive.