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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #46  
Old 08-02-2009, 12:00 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

oh yes a really big THANK YOU to the bros or maybe sister who up my points, thank you.
  #47  
Old 08-02-2009, 01:17 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by just4fun View Post
Sometime i just cant seem to be able to understand people like yourself....

Let's not talk about PRC either good/bad...You are saying that ur colleagues whom married PRC are happily together....but can u marry her???? Can you bring her to SG????You are thinking of marrying her in china...while you are still married in Sg....Come on...you cant be using yourself to compare with them...This is nothing but mere selfishness....

You might not know...In china, if your gf brought you back home to see her parents, it will mean that you guys are officially together...words will spread especially in the countryside places.... One fine day, you decided to leave her...you are actually runining her life

Come on...think more...Dun be a jerk!!! Be fair to both ladies... This is NOT about how to choose, but how you are going to change other lifes, even more applicable when you have kids....

爱她变成害她!!!
I do not wana have 2 women in my life. You got it all wrong. If i've chosen the PRC, i will divorce my wife & bring the PRC to SG to stay..
  #48  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:16 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by leecs View Post
I do not wana have 2 women in my life. You got it all wrong. If i've chosen the PRC, i will divorce my wife & bring the PRC to SG to stay..
Think twice, think twice X 100. Dont be naive. We siilyporean are known to be naive and think is love the only matter. Alot of practical issue involved. Not all are bad and after money. Though they are not materialistic, they are freaking hell realistic. Tell her, currently u r facing financial problem and need 3 years to settle by yourself, and see whether she will wait for you? Younger one might and sure they will. But for those age 27 and above, I can bet with you the outcome, their decision.
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  #49  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:29 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

I got a bro in financial deep shit. Told his ex to give him 3 years, he sure marry her. They both were deeply in love. But she replied, just waiting got no security, and she married few months later. Now divorce with a 2 year old daughter.

I got another bro, who is deeply in love with a shanghainess girl. Jobless, and told her to wait 6months, for sure can get a job in shanghai and move over to stay with her. She said she love him also and willing to wait. 2 weeks later, keep shouting at him that she lost patience and looking for a guy to get marry soon.

Bro, love is love, reality and culture differences make us world apart. Be realistic and hope future sillyporean can stop being naive.
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  #50  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:35 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by Niceman View Post
Think twice, think twice X 100. Dont be naive. We siilyporean are known to be naive and think is love the only matter. Alot of practical issue involved. Not all are bad and after money. Though they are not materialistic, they are freaking hell realistic. Tell her, currently u r facing financial problem and need 3 years to settle by yourself, and see whether she will wait for you? Younger one might and sure they will. But for those age 27 and above, I can bet with you the outcome, their decision.
she'll be coming back here to work maybe a yr or so soon. i'll see how it goes.. shes 25 btw, although it doesnt mean anything
  #51  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:38 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by leecs View Post
Im experienicing what TS is having right now. The relationship with my wife is not so good now. She doesnt want to have babies, wedding dinner, etc. She wants to lead the life for just the 2 of us forever. I cant do it. I did try to talk to her, but she will say she dont like babies. they are irritating, nuisance & she will say why dont we have a divorce & dont waste each others time... I've given up on this relationship. I really cant stay with my wife anymore.

This made me more wana be with the PRC. But shes in china now. Although she rejected me because im married, I told her i wont give up... Now i just gotta wait for her to come back then say...

She is the 2nd girl that made me fallen so deep. the 1st 1 was my childhood love.
Understand how u feel, bro, I got same feeling for my ex-gf also. Since your wife is currently such, maybe can think about it. But as for your prc lover, I think u r seeking comfort and re-identifying yourself. Don't make the decision so quickly, de-emotionalize yourself before future action, which will sure cause some reaction, be it bad or good. Why jump gun? in prc, if you got money, no scare no women lah.

Cheers and good luck.
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  #52  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:44 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by leecs View Post
she'll be coming back here to work maybe a yr or so soon. i'll see how it goes.. shes 25 btw, although it doesnt mean anything
25 nia.... she coming in to explore opportunity for herself lah. Not mainly for you. Now jobs are lesser everywhere. Come here work? her ang moh ok anot? can write report in ang moh anot? If not, work as what? waitress? then later she will kbkp that her legs tired and wanna you to feed her, and also her family back in china. You can tahan anot? If she rich, you better move over to seek opportunity yourself since life here getting tougher and tougher, with ever increasing taxation day after day.

Cheers
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  #53  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:49 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by Niceman View Post
Understand how u feel, bro, I got same feeling for my ex-gf also. Since your wife is currently such, maybe can think about it. But as for your prc lover, I think u r seeking comfort and re-identifying yourself. Don't make the decision so quickly, de-emotionalize yourself before future action, which will sure cause some reaction, be it bad or good. Why jump gun? in prc, if you got money, no scare no women lah.

Cheers and good luck.
i dont think im seeking comfort or what not. its not the nationality im looking for. its the woman im looking for. i will not make rash moves. i'll wait for her to come back, then i see how strong our relationship is, then decide.
  #54  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:54 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by leecs View Post
i dont think im seeking comfort or what not. its not the nationality im looking for. its the woman im looking for. i will not make rash moves. i'll wait for her to come back, then i see how strong our relationship is, then decide.
You are in such situation with your wife and now u got a gf. U R !! I was in the same shit like yours, a lot of quarrel and frustration. She walked into your life when u r lonely, and thus, u feeling love again. Well, i wont lor soh. Is your life anyway.
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  #55  
Old 08-02-2009, 02:56 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Hi TS, pls get your divorce done deal first before you fully commit yourself to the Chinese gal. Keep her out of the picture from your wife else your divorce will take the hell lot out from you to your soon to be ex-wife!
My advice to you is: you can visit the Chinese gal and get her to bring you to see her family. If she's really serious about the relationship, she'll be more than happy to do so. Also DO NOT get married with the Chinese gal once you are through with the divorce, get to know her even better before you commit yourself again. Things maybe fine when you are jus BF & GF but things will be different when you are staying together and being a part of each other's life.
I have my share of experience though not with a Chinese gal, a SG gal, now going thru the divorce. I do have someone I love a lot in China and she loves me as much too. I can't commit to her now and told her about the situation, she said she'll wait. I'm touched by that and I know she really will wait as we went thru a lot together. I hope the best will turn out for you
  #56  
Old 08-02-2009, 03:00 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by Niceman View Post
You are in such situation with your wife and now u got a gf. U R !! I was in the same shit like yours, a lot of quarrel and frustration. She walked into your life when u r lonely, and thus, u feeling love again. Well, i wont lor soh. Is your life anyway.
i dont wana live the 2 of us for the rest of our lives like that. i wana have a baby. but she doesnt want. shes feels that its irritating, nuisance. i did tried talking to her, but it didnt work.
  #57  
Old 08-02-2009, 06:35 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by leecs View Post
I do not wana have 2 women in my life. You got it all wrong. If i've chosen the PRC, i will divorce my wife & bring the PRC to SG to stay..
that's solve your prob....divorce your wife...discard your family....bring her to sg....register...and done deal....

but before you do it....think twice and think hard....

time will judge your decision....right or wrong...u choose it....
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  #58  
Old 08-02-2009, 09:34 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by just4fun View Post
that's solve your prob....divorce your wife...discard your family....bring her to sg....register...and done deal....

but before you do it....think twice and think hard....

time will judge your decision....right or wrong...u choose it....
Its really a big decision that affects the rest of my life. I've to think over very hard. Luckily i still do not have a child if this thing really happens. If i have, it be more worse...

But for now, I really wana see my PRC. Miss her very much.
  #59  
Old 08-02-2009, 11:30 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

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Originally Posted by leecs View Post
Its really a big decision that affects the rest of my life. I've to think over very hard. Luckily i still do not have a child if this thing really happens. If i have, it be more worse...

But for now, I really wana see my PRC. Miss her very much.
Where your PRC stay? Maybe can check background info for you...hehehe...
  #60  
Old 08-02-2009, 11:56 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Quote:
Originally Posted by leecs View Post
Its really a big decision that affects the rest of my life. I've to think over very hard. Luckily i still do not have a child if this thing really happens. If i have, it be more worse...

But for now, I really wana see my PRC. Miss her very much.
Bro I dunnoe if its the child you want or the PRC girl you want or it is the divorce (from your wife) that you want. To me, they are 3 different matters.

We dun know where your PRC girl come from and what she does for a living, but we sure know you do not marry just for a child. Else you won't be married to your wife or after you know she doesn't want a child, you wouldn't stay married if you want a child desperately enough. So the 'child-theory' do not stand.

You said luckily you do not have a child if this really happens, this further prove that you want to leave your wife not becos she dun want to bore you one. You said it yourself bro.

Then of cos, the next likely reason is, you just want your PRC girl. In order for you to feel a bit better, the child reason seems goooood. Good enough for a divorce at least. 传宗接代 right? You are at the right side of all moral implications. And that's exactly what you will tell your wife, we divorce becos you hate children and I love them.

Well I guess a lot of us feels the same about PRC girls. Hopefully after you marrying your PRC(assuming your wife agrees to your assumption that she will choose not to have children against your wishes for divorce), you get a life with lots of children. Maybe she'll even adopt some from her relatives, maybe she already got one bunch of kids with her ex, maybe she already did her sterilisation....but then those will never be your concerns anyway, right?
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