Foreplay - Understanding your partner's Needs

[JEMMA]

In human sexual behavior, foreplay is a set of emotionally and physically intimate acts between two or more people meant to create sexual arousal and desire for sexual activity. Foreplay results in physiological and mental responses in both parties in anticipation of the expected sexual activity. Either or any of the sexual partners may indicate sexual interest and initiate foreplay, and the initiator may not be the active partner during the sexual activity. Foreplay stimulates both partners' sexuality, lowers inhibitions and increases emotional intimacy between partners, and implies a certain level of confidence and trust between the partners. In animal sexual behavior, the loose equivalent is sometimes termed 'precoital activity'.



Sexual desire is an aspect of a person's sexuality, which varies from one person to another. A person who desires sexual activity with another person can attempt to provoke sexual arousal in the person. Depending on the type and intensity of the relationship between the two people, the stimuli may involve indicating to the person in some subtle and romantic way that he or she has that desire or by provoking other erotic stimuli. There are many potential stimuli, both physical and mental, which can cause a person to become sexually aroused, and which stimuli are invoked will depend on circumstances at a particular time.

On the other hand, there are other things which act as turn-offs, depending on the person's preferences. The response to an indication of sexual interest may be inhibited by issues of sexual morality.

The Initiation

Foreplay can begin with one person indicating in some manner to another person a desire to engage in sexual activity with that other person. Any act that creates and enhances sexual desire, interest, stimulation or arousal in a sexual partner may constitute foreplay. An indication of sexual desire can be through physical intimacy, such as kissing, touching, embracing or nibbling the partner. Mental engagement can also create sexual interest, such as flirting, talking, whispering or teasing. It may, for example, be a non-physical gesture that indicates sexual availability. Sexual interest can be indicated and created by nudity, such as by one partner stripping, or by wearing sexually suggestive clothing, or by creating a romantic, intimate, or overtly sexual atmosphere. The manual or oral touching of an erogenous zone may indicate sexual interest, as does an intimate kiss on the mouth, breasts, stomach, buttocks, back and inner thighs or other areas of the body. A passionate or French kisscommonly indicates sexual interest, as does any removal of a partner's clothing.



Verbally, foreplay may include compliments, subtle comments with double entendre, and intimate conversations. Non-verbally, foreplay can include provocative clothing, suggestive postures and motions, preening gestures, winking, licking or biting one's lips, standing inside a partner's personal space, and holding a gaze longer than would be expected from only a casual interest.



Foreplay commences when the other partner indicates reciprocal sexual interest. Depending on the context, the non-objection to a partner's advances may indicate that the sexual interest is reciprocated, as may a response to a kiss or hug. The non-objection to the touching of an erogenous zone, or the taking off of an item of clothing may indicate reciprocated sexual interest. Also, the other partner may indicate reciprocal interest by engaging in intimate behaviour of their own.



There are situations which act as turn-offs or which can affect the romantic or erotic moment that may have been created. Turn-offs can range from things like bad breath, body odor, excessive noise or a reference to an ex-partner. A person's sexual inhibition can also impact on creation or maintenance of sexual interest. Some people feel uncomfortable with acts such as French kissing, or the possibility of someone (e.g. children) intruding, or nudity, besides other situations.

Here's some classic favourites of mine:

The Tongue

I want to repeat, there's almost nothing you can do with your tongue that won't feel terrific, so relax! I promise, you may be confused and uncertain, but she's in heaven.
Any licking and sucking of her lips, cunt, or clit are going to feel just great, and I'd no sooner tell guys to "do it exactly like this" than I would tell every chef to follow the same recipe. But for those who are compelled to RTMF, here are a few techniques that you might like to try:



Play around in the vestibule, try lapping her pussy from her cunt up to her clit, leaving your tongue soft and jaw relaxed. This is a good way to start your tonguing. Run your tongue between the inner and outer lips on one side, while holding the two together with your lips. Good job, now do the other side. Fuck her cunt with your tongue - in and out, around and around, etc. This feels nice. Not wonderful or incredible or earthshaking, nice. Keep your tongue in her cunt for a while, moving the tip around and around and . . . That feels better, now lick up to her clit again and kiss it, watch her shudder.



Feel the texture of the tip of her clit with your tongue, notice the taste of it. Spend some time slowly licking your tongue over all of her pussy, savoring the various tastes and textures.
Spread her outer lips with your hand. Then, with your tongue pointed and stiff, gently flick here and there. Feel free to roam, but keep coming back to her clit. This drives some women wild, and others can't take it. Some may prefer that you always leave your tongue soft, so when you try this, pay attention to whether those moans are ecstasy or pain.

The following techniques should not be introduced until your partner is really hot (i.e., she's no longer coherent). These are very intense actions which may be "too much" for some women, even when nearing orgasm.
With her clit still exposed, give it a quick little suck - pulling it into your mouth briefly and letting it go. This is a lot like licking a bit of cake batter off of your pinky. This feels incredible, and is a fine thing to do if you feel like torturing her.

(see PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER below).







Take her exposed clit into your mouth and gently (at first, anyway) suck on it, simultaneously flicking your tongue over and around it. This can be done very lightly or very aggressively, and combined with fingering, will usually rapidly produce an intense orgasm.
Another choice technique involves rolling your tongue into a tube. If you can't do this with your tongue, you can't learn it - it's genetic. For those who can, this works best in an inverted or 69 position. Roll your tongue into a tube around the shaft of her clit. Slide it up and down; in effect, your tongue makes a tiny cunt for her clit to fuck. This also is likely to bring her over the edge.

[cordycep]

Tks again for nice story.
Please post more.

[trami]

Great story and nice pic to go with the story.
Camping here for more great updates.

[CafeUm]

Another nice thread by TS.
Hope to see and read more.

[nasduck]

Clap clap for nice share.
Camping for more.

[FirstPrice]

Awesome thread, thanks!!

[JEMMA]

Fingers

Fingers are valuable adjuncts to eating pussy. Most women masturbate by pressing a finger or fingers over their clit, possibly "thru" the skin of their lips, and vigorously rubbing in a circular or back-and-forth direction. You can do this too, ask her, or better yet, have her show you how she likes it done. You'll never be a good lover until you can bring your woman to climax with your hands. When you fuck her from behind, or really in any position which doesn't allow her to simultaneously rub her clit against your body, reach down or around and rub her clit. I know it's distracting, but just do it anyway.

One important point to note: make sure that your fingers are well lubricated and most of all, your nails cut, I mean cut back to the quick and sanded smooth. The slightest hangnail can be very painful when raked over that tender flesh. There's nothing more uncomfortable (and sometimes downright painful) than a dry finger or hangnail roughly rubbed across one's clit.



Of course, that's not all you can do with your fingers. One technique which is very exciting is to spread her lips wide apart with one hand, and with your index finger straight like a pencil, flick the side of it rapidly across her clit. This motion alone will often bring a woman to orgasm. Combining this with the addition of some tongue action elsewhere is nothing short of bliss.

Sticking one or more fingers inside her cunt can also be wonderful. How many fingers you use depends on the woman. Some women don't want you to stick your finger in their cunt at all, some like only one (at least at first), some like their cunt to be full so the more the better (within reason). You can simply move them in and out (this feels best with at least two or three fingers pushed in hard) or wiggle them around. A particularly intense motion is to face your hand so that you have two fingers inside her with your palm facing the front of her body. Now move your fingers rapidly, as if waving hello.



You're aiming to stimulate a particular part of the woman's vagina - namely the lower anterior (front) part. When combined with sucking her clit, this is nearly certain to bring her to a fast and intense climax.

If you're between her legs, busily eating away, and want to finger her at the same time, your thumb (or thumbs) may be the best ones to use. It is difficult to turn your other fingers around to work on her "G" spot. It also allows you to use your other fingers on her clit and the rest of her pussy.






An excellent way to begin manual stimulation is to stick one (and later two) fingers inside her, with your palm cupped over the mons area. I'm talking about that fleshy "mound" over her pubic bone. Your finger goes in and out and the ball of your hand is pressed hard against her pussy. You may want to rub or even shake the entire area with your palm.

[JEMMA]

Doing the 69

69 can be done male on top, female on top, or side by side. The latter two are easier, though it's more restful with both partners lying down. Some women love being licked on all fours, so if female-on-top 69 drives her wild, take the hint and find ways to eat her in this position. All she has to do is slide her knees out and you'll find your mouth in her pussy. I happen to enjoy male on top, but for women who haven't learned to deep-throat, this is a sure choking position. If your woman wants to deep-throat you while you're eating her, male-on-top is THE 69 position. When her head is tilted back, especially if you're taller than she is, you can really slide your cock all the way down her throat. But don't forget what you're supposed to be doing!



Each of you must realize that you can't let up on what you're supposed to be doing just because what the other is doing feels so good. Instead of letting up, let the pleasure you're feeling enhance what you're doing. It's sort of like a payback, you're making me feel so good I'm going to make you feel even better. Once you've mastered throat fucking, man on top 69 can really get interesting, he can eat you and fuck you at the same time. The only problem comes when he can't make up his mind whether to concentrate on fucking or sucking. Don't worry about it, just lie there and enjoy it, let him sort it out, he'll get around to finishing both jobs.



The element that must be in place for good 69 is simple: Both of you must be experienced! Each of you must realize that when what the other is doing feels so good, you can't just let up on what you're supposed to be doing to enjoy it. Instead of letting up, let the pleasure you're feeling enhance what you're doing, share each other's emotions. That's why, when my lover and I engage in oral sex, we like 69 so much, we can build each other's pleasure to such wonderful simultaneous climaxes.



As I said earlier, some women feel lonely when you're eating their pussy, they want something to hug. Well, you can give them something. Eat her in a side by side 69 position and let her hug your cock, with her mouth. She can put her arms around your hips, press her breasts against you and hold your cock in her mouth while you put her on cloud nine, just make sure you tell her not to distract you too much.



If you have a man who is not in the least interested in giving head and only likes to receive it, then to attempt 69 is to ask for unhappiness in your relationship. You can tell if he really likes to eat your pussy. See if you can find a time when the two of you are in bed naked on your backs and he doesn't have a hard-on. Quietly roll over onto your knees, straddle his head and slowly rub your muff over his face, letting your moist lips slide over his nose and mouth. Look back at his cock. If it springs up toward the ceiling and you find his tongue in your cunt, then he likes it.
UUUUNNNNGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!! (or, I'M CUMMING!!!)



Okay, she's grabbed your head and pressed your face into her muff; she's practically suffocating you, she's screaming and bucking up in the air; you feel her cunt contracting wildly - how long should you keep it up?? The answer is simple, until she makes you stop. Some women may stop you after five seconds from the start of their climax, others may be able to roll right into another orgasm if you'd just keep going. Do come up for air, but remember, her excitement does not drop off as sharply as yours does.

Play it safe by continuing the stimulation.

[JEMMA]

If you're sucking her clit and finger-fucking her at the same time, you're giving her far more stimulation than you would be giving her with your cock alone. So you can count on it that she's getting high on this. If there's any doubt, check her out for symptoms. Each woman is unique. You may have one whose nipples get hard when she's excited or only when she's having an orgasm. Your girl might flush red or begin to tremble. Get to know her symptoms and you'll be a more sensitive lover. When she starts to have an orgasm, for heaven's sakes, don't let go of that clit. Hang in there for the duration. When she starts to come down from the first orgasm, press your tongue along the underside of the clit, leaving your lips covering the top.



Move your tongue in and out of her cunt. If your fingers are inside, move them a little, gently though, things are extremely sensitive just now. If you play your cards right, you'll get some multiple orgasms this way, a woman stays excited for an hour after she's had an orgasm.



How many times does she need to cum? Some women are very content to have one orgasm. A whole lot of women would really like to cum again, but need about five minutes to recoup. Many women are so sensitive right after they cum that they may push your head violently away. This doesn't necessarily mean they've had enough, only that you need to stop for a few minutes. In fact most women, given a short rest between, are capable of cumming again and again. A smaller percentage of women are able to cum repeatedly with continued stimulation. This is the much-touted multiple-orgasm that's experienced by a minority of women. I know this makes it difficult to know when enough is enough, but there's a simple answer: ask her.



After you've made her cum, don't leave her alone just yet. A man can get off and go to sleep in the same breath and feel no remorse, no sense of loss. But a woman, by nature, requires some sensitivity from her lover in those first few moments after sex. Don't wipe yourself off, walk around the bed to get to the other side, go to the bathroom.

Maintain close physical contact, work your way from where you were when she climaxed to holding her in your arms.



Lie close together, arms and legs intertwined, wet bodies pressed close together, let your cock lie in the folds of her pussy. Talk to her, stroke her body, caress her breasts. Keep making love to her quietly until she's come all the way down, or, if nature allows, builds back up. If you've just finished my favorite 69, do some serious kissing. Taste your own juices as her tongue brings traces of it into your mouth while your tongue passes her woman's essence to her taste buds. Taste the delicious mixtures as your tongues dart back and forth, mixing the sweet cunt and cock sex juices in your mouths. Who knows what new pleasures this could lead to as your passions begin to rebuild.



GOD!!! I'M SO EXCITED, IT FEELS GREAT BUT I JUST CAN'T CUM to all of us sometimes - distraction, embarrassment, anxiety, or just an inability to "let go." What do you do about it? The first question is, can she easily bring herself to a climax in the privacy of her own home. If the answer is no - then she needs to do some homework. There are two books on the subject that I know of: "For Yourself: The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality" by Lonnie Barbach, and "Sex for One: The Joy of Self-loving" by Betty Dodson; pick up one. Then tell her to read it, study it, and practice, practice, practice! Now if your partner is orgasmic only when alone - ask her point blank: "Is there something different I can do?" Many women are shy about criticizing their lovers, but if asked outright will surprise you with a very specific answer. It may be a simple matter of mechanics, like a little to right, please, or not so rough, or more pressure and faster. Ah . . . perfect.



But suppose everything is wonderful. She says you're doing everything right but she just can't cum. There are two probable causes: self-consciousness and/or self-loathing. For women who can't help watching themselves, the best approach is to eliminate anything that focuses her attention on what the two of you're doing. This is a "be here now" kind of thing - definitely not an introspective activity. Get that mirror off the ceiling. Dim the lights or turn them off completely. Put on some soft music. Share a glass of port. (I said A glass - getting drunk will definitely not help).



Have her lie on her back, or propped up comfortably with some pillows. This isn't the time for her to sit on your face, or the edge of the bed, or stand up against a wall. Arrange a time when you can devote a long period to eating her pussy, and then just keep it up. Forget everything I said about asking her questions - just close your eyes and get into it. I know this can be a difficult and exhausting exercise, but she'll be extravagantly thankful for your efforts. It gets easier each time. If all else fails, get accustomed to masturbating together. Gradually begin to add your stimulation to her own, right before she's about to cum anyway. Over time, you can take over completely.



For women who feel that their pussys are dirty or distasteful, all of the above methods may be helpful, but the underlying issue must also be addressed. I am amazed at how many women are ambivalent about their own genitals. They don't love "that part" of their body, and they can't believe that you would either. Yes, it's important to be clean. But clean means a daily shower which includes washing their pussy. It doesn't mean vainly attempting to remove every trace of smell or taste. The natural taste and fragrance of the fresh secretions from a healthy woman's pussy are beautiful and erotic.



Hopefully you agree (and if not, try hard to cultivate this attitude). When she learns to love her pussy, she'll be infinitely more comfortable with your loving it too. Menstruation I haven't met a lot of men who are completely comfortable going down on a woman when she has her period. But some are. Most women are at their horniest before and sometimes during their period. You should definitely find a way to make her cum when she's bleeding, be it through fucking, manual, or oral stimulation. If you feel comfortable going down on her, great, it's perfectly safe. As you now know, you don't need to get anywhere near her cunt to make her cum. You may suggest that she insert a tampon, and then wash up. Or you could lay down a few old towels, turn out the lights, and forget about menstruation.





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